Luxurious German “UAZ” or a barrel of tar in a barrel of honey.

April 13 Mercedes Gelandewagen was and remains one of the most solid and brutal cars in the world. I won't be mistaken if I say that every man sometimes dreams of buying this SUV, at least not specifically, but abstractly.

The last one is about me. Seriously I never aspired to become the owner of Gelika (that old, that such a new car is only for the rich), but looked at him with respect and slight envy for the owners.

Could I have missed the opportunity to ride the Gelandewagen? Are you laughing? Of course not! Here he is, handsome.

G350 2015 with a three-liter turbodiesel and a 7-speed automatic. On the odometer a little over 80, the condition is very decent.

Super! We sit down.
Here are the doors! I barely opened it out of habit. Lubricate them or something … Ah, I remembered, this is a proprietary feature. No tenderness, you should feel a real car! Opening and closing occur with a pronounced effort. A deaf, but distinctly audible “thump” when the doors slam shut is also branded.

In general, in comparison with modern SUVs, and even more so crossovers, Gelik at first amazes with condos. Of course, German designers can only be applauded: from a utilitarian car, without fundamentally changing the architecture, they made a status, luxury car, stuffing both electronics and comfortable lotions into it. From an engineering point of view, this is incredibly difficult!

But miracles still do not happen. In the past, he was a military UAZ, and it is felt. Having properly banged the door, you get a little crazy: a small, almost vertical windshield, the ceiling presses on the top of your head, an overly “captain's” landing with a straight back, a clear lack of space for the left shoulder.

Rear passengers will also not be spoiled for legroom and imposing posture.

But the trunk is clearly not bad, and the shape is correct, like the correct one for the whole car – the square of the cube)).

He started it, the diesel engine rumbles very pleasantly, and the steering wheel barely turns! GUR faulty? Ahh, nooo, corporate identity again. For decades, Gelandewagen has been famous for its very tight steering wheel. Again, when you switch from a regular car – and I switched to it from a Toyota Highlander – all this old school is a little shocking.

Especially when you remember how much such a car costs …. The worst of the same parameters now starts from 4,000,000, but in general a similar G-class can “weigh” 5 and 6 million.

Okay, let's go. The engine is very nice! The volume is only three liters, and two and a half tons of German iron move quite cheerfully in space. The point here, of course, is also in the excellent transmission settings, for which we once again applaud the developers, but the motor itself is good. And the owners praise him for his reliability.

Of course, no one is immune from bad diesel fuel and fuel problems, but without such excesses, the engine “runs” for a long time. Moreover, this 240-horsepower unit can be chipped up to 270 “horses” without damage to the resource, and get even more pleasure.

But there is never too much pleasure, and, returning to the transmission, you should pay attention to the button with the letters ES near the automatic transmission selector. With its pressing, Gelik runs even more cheerfully, it really pleases!

But handling …. after a passenger car, it simply does not exist. Here, of course, hello to the bridges and the frame, cars with such a construct, by definition, cannot be the standard of taxiing. But Merce is still unnecessarily uninformative, you have to get used to it very, very much. I drove a Ford F250 for a long time, which is not only pavement, but also fully spring, but somehow I felt it better. And the body and steering wheel of the Mercedes seem to be completely separated from the wheels.

Well, at least the brakes are decent, you enter the turn on a whim, but you slow down in front of it predictably. Surprisingly, I did not find any huge Brembo movements or anything like that. In the 20s of the Brabus “skating rinks”, regular discs and calipers seem frankly small, however, I repeat, the car slows down as it should.

By the way, praise and rubber. The Mickey Thompson Baja ATZ (in this case size 285/55R20) is aggressive and muddy among ATs, while being suspiciously quiet at speeds, although take a look at this picture:

Miracles, and nothing more. However, once again we praise the manufacturer of this machine for the excellent work – the sound insulation is on top! It seems that after “hundreds” this brick should emit merciless aerodynamic noise. And the elephant is quiet!

Yes, and after a certain mileage you get used to the lack of a direct connection with the road, you even begin to find a certain buzz in this. Personally, I love soft cars, the Gelandewagen holds the trajectory well, and super-sharp steering has never been my top priority.

This is how you swim, ironing the imperfect Russian asphalt with the strong body of a European SUV, and everything is up to the light bulb. But is this body really that strong? And is it all down to the bulb?

No, the skeleton itself is really powerful. Body, frame, bridges – all this goes for a long time. But there are some very tender “bones” in the body.

Once again, let's pay attention – the car has low mileage and good condition, clearly indicating careful operation. However, the current owner has already been forced to replace the sagging springs. We put the RIF with a four-centimeter lift. Gelik became a little more collected on the go, from a distance it looks taller and somehow sportier.

Recently, a tie rod boot requiring replacement was also discovered. Still not engaged, but it may be necessary to replace the entire part.

And the rumor ascribes low reliability to cardans. I try not to “holivariate” at all and not try to “drown” for the Japanese, Germans or Russians. But to me, as the owner of Toyota, which is over 100 thousand km. run required only a scheduled replacement of consumables, it is strange to observe such tenderness of the “great Gelendos”.

At the same time, he is still a real off-road fighter with all the locks and excellent geometry. Of course, now it is already more a fashionable carriage than a mud wagon. However, if there are moneybags who want to shove the expensive Gelik off-road, he does not give up there. But how many of them…

In general, this is really a fly in the ointment in a spoon of honey, or vice versa. Charisma rolls over, the car is attractive, has a soul, and does not just move you from point A to point B. There is a lot to like, but there is a lot that raises questions, especially at an extremely high cost.

If you approach this car with a philistine, consumer measure of “what I get for this money”, it turns out that some of what I get is very indisputable.

It seems that true connoisseurs, ready to defend the good name of this SUV, even in a fight, or even in a shootout, just fall in love, as they say now, that's all. In what is called Mercedes Gelandewagen. And for the uniqueness of him all the flaws are forgiven, even if they are not few.

Many off-road accessories that I write about can be purchased at my online stores: